day #365 - the end of an era

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I thought I was on top of it; I had finished early and was looking for a movie to watch already 3 hours ago. And I don't know how time went by. A phonecall, some networking studying, some online shopping and here we are, already past the time for an early movie. Regardless, today is a special day. The blog is over! I finished 365 days of daily painting and recording it, whatever that means. A big part of the process I will have to keep doing mainly for myself. Perhaps taking daily photos of my work and saving it on some folder. This has provem useful many times when I trying to date a piece I've been working on. Also making a small diary of today's achievements. It's still useful. But this will be done for my eyes only. I also don't know if I will be continuing my obsessively daily painting. How would life be if I had days off? Now for example that I'm moving out and I have to daily chores that until now were completely taken care of, perhaps I'll allow my
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day #287 -We only come out at night (pt2)

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Today I kept listening to smashing pumpkins covers, and kept trying to capture a good image of the acrylics painting I've been trying to photograph. Despite the drag, I managed to break a negative-streak of iPading and finally did some watercolors! I find it a very balanced piece, and something that is clearly my style (who would had thought that I have one). Still it doesn't feel like it's breaking any new grounds or telling some profound truth; I'm starting to build the negative narrative that these pieces are a form of cheap sellouts and whenever I do them I've been taking the easy road. I need to work on that judgement since it's not helping me. Or if I can't, then I'd better stop doing such pieces altogether, maybe they are a sellout!
So let's take a step back and see what was good about today: It's a personal style alright; It's something of my own, not something that I've seen, something that I have artificially created but it's something that has emerged out my own psyche and my personal tendencies; I need to want to ought to celebrate and embrace it! Deep down I like paintodrawing like that, I love it. But I feel it's not good "value of money" - it's nearing "a waste of paper if you can't fill it, if you use squiggles and call it a painting" - says the voice in my head. If the shame goes away I don't see what is wrong with that, I'm sure it will take a life of itsown! What else is good for that piece? Well, the signature! It's not too often that I feel the signature hasn't ruined the piece; today has been one of those days - pretty and balanced in its placement! Finally (the most important one too) is that I managed to put the ipad and the doodles aside, and do an actual painting. These days I don't have the energy to paint outdoors, so this little piece comes as a big relief. Time for rest!

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