day #365 - the end of an era

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I thought I was on top of it; I had finished early and was looking for a movie to watch already 3 hours ago. And I don't know how time went by. A phonecall, some networking studying, some online shopping and here we are, already past the time for an early movie. Regardless, today is a special day. The blog is over! I finished 365 days of daily painting and recording it, whatever that means. A big part of the process I will have to keep doing mainly for myself. Perhaps taking daily photos of my work and saving it on some folder. This has provem useful many times when I trying to date a piece I've been working on. Also making a small diary of today's achievements. It's still useful. But this will be done for my eyes only. I also don't know if I will be continuing my obsessively daily painting. How would life be if I had days off? Now for example that I'm moving out and I have to daily chores that until now were completely taken care of, perhaps I'll allow my
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day #13 - Munchian Landscape

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Meh, I was hardly willing to paint today but I did it anyway. At some point a few years back, I heard an idea that as long as you are making steps in the direction you want, no matter how slow, you are bound to get there (if you live long enough adds the cynic). Since painting has been something I want to get better, back then I was okay as long as I did something painting-related every single day. It was a nice feeling; I don't know how it slipped out of my control again. Nowadays even subconsciously I count the hours I've worked. And no matter if I'm spending hours on building my new studio, or I'm too busy with my livelihood, I still feel it is a disgrace to put anything below 4 or 5 hours in painting.

In that regard, today has been the most shameful one; I think it took me around 20minutes and preparing the blog post has been another 20minutes (which is very frustrating come to think about it). I've spent an eternity being very hard on myself, and I know I once again at my throat. These last few months I'm overworked and yet, the more overworked I am, the more strict I become. I know I need some rest, but I don't know how to. The very thought of just taking a break (not just painting) scares the hell out of me.

Anyway - I feel like Bob Ross here. I mean, the trees are simple brushstrokes - I wasn't even planing on making a landscape, let along planting tress but I was too lazy and I didn't enjoy the paper (funnily, this is the good watercolor paper) so it all was a lazy job.

When

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